Excessive people pleasing behavior, what is it:

Excessive people pleasing behavior, what is it:

Excessive people-pleasing behavior, also known as people-pleasing or approval-seeking behavior, refers to a pattern of behavior where an individual goes to great lengths to gain the approval, validation, or acceptance of others. People who engage in excessive people-pleasing often prioritize the needs and desires of others over their own, sometimes at the expense of their own well-being.

Key characteristics of excessive people-pleasing behavior may include:

Fear of Disapproval: People-pleasers often have an intense fear of being disliked, rejected, or criticized by others. This fear may drive them to seek constant approval and avoid any form of conflict.

Difficulty Saying No: Individuals with people-pleasing tendencies may find it challenging to say no, even when it is in their best interest. They may take on too many responsibilities or agree to things they don’t genuinely want to do.

Avoidance of Conflict: People-pleasers may go to great lengths to avoid conflict or disagreement. They may suppress their own opinions or needs to maintain a harmonious environment.

Low Self-Esteem: Excessive people-pleasing can be linked to low self-esteem. The individual may derive their sense of self-worth from the approval of others, leading to a constant need for external validation.

Over-Apologizing: People-pleasers may apologize frequently, even for things that are not their fault. They may apologize to avoid confrontation or to seek reassurance that they are not upsetting others.

Difficulty Expressing Authentic Emotions: Individuals who excessively people-please may struggle to express their true emotions, fearing that their genuine feelings might be met with disapproval.

Neglect of Personal Needs: People-pleasers often prioritize the needs of others over their own, neglecting self-care and personal well-being.

Excessive people-pleasing can have negative consequences on mental health and relationships. It may lead to feelings of frustration, resentment, and burnout. It’s important for individuals exhibiting these behaviors to develop a healthier balance between meeting their own needs and maintaining positive social connections. This may involve setting boundaries, learning to say no when necessary, and building self-esteem independent of external validation. Therapy can be a helpful resource for those looking to address and change these patterns of behavior.

Shervan K Shahhian