Tag Archives: abuse

Trauma Bonding, a great explanation:

Trauma bonding, a great explanation:

Trauma bonding refers to a strong emotional connection that develops between individuals who have experienced intense, often negative, and sometimes abusive situations together.

This term is commonly used in the context of relationships where there is a shared experience of trauma or hardship. Here’s a breakdown of the concept:

Definition: Trauma bonding is a psychological phenomenon where individuals form deep emotional connections as a result of going through intense, distressing, or traumatic experiences together.

Shared Adversity: The bond often develops in situations where people face adversity, such as abuse, violence, or other forms of trauma. The shared experience creates a unique and powerful connection between them.

Intensity of Experience: Trauma bonds are characterized by the intensity of the emotional experiences shared. The extreme highs and lows, the fear, and the sense of survival can create a strong bond that is difficult to break.

Dependency: Individuals in trauma bonds may develop a sense of dependency on each other due to the shared history of trauma. This dependency can create a reluctance to break away from the relationship, even if it is unhealthy.

Cognitive Dissonance: Trauma bonding often involves cognitive dissonance, where individuals simultaneously hold conflicting beliefs or feelings. Despite the negative aspects of the relationship, there may be a strong emotional attachment that makes it difficult for them to leave.

Cycle of Abuse: Trauma bonds can be prevalent in abusive relationships. The abuser may alternate between moments of kindness and extreme cruelty, creating confusion and strengthening the emotional ties between the victim and the abuser.

Difficulty Breaking Free: Due to the intense emotional connection and dependency, individuals in trauma bonds may find it challenging to break free from the relationship even when it is harmful. This can contribute to a cycle of abuse and perpetuate unhealthy patterns.

Understanding trauma bonding is crucial in the context of therapy and support for individuals in such relationships. Breaking free from a trauma bond often involves recognizing the unhealthy dynamics, seeking professional help, and establishing a support system to facilitate healing and recovery.

Shervan K Shahhian

Shame in Trauma Survivors:

Shame in Trauma Survivors:

Shame is a complex and often pervasive emotion that can be experienced by trauma survivors. Trauma, whether it be physical, emotional, or psychological, can have profound effects on an individual’s sense of self-worth, identity, and how they perceive themselves and others. Shame may arise as a result of the traumatic experience itself, or it can be influenced by societal attitudes, cultural norms, and personal beliefs.

Here are a few ways in which shame might manifest in trauma survivors:

Self-Blame: Trauma survivors may unfairly blame themselves for the events that occurred, even if the trauma was beyond their control. This self-blame can contribute to feelings of shame.

Stigmatization: Society’s sometimes negative attitudes toward trauma survivors can lead to a sense of being stigmatized. This can make individuals feel as if they are somehow flawed or unworthy, intensifying feelings of shame.

Survivor’s Guilt: In situations where others may have suffered or not survived the same trauma, survivors might experience guilt for having survived. This guilt can evolve into shame, especially if the survivor believes they should have done more to prevent the harm.

Changes in Self-Perception: Trauma can alter an individual’s perception of themselves. They may view themselves as damaged, tainted, or somehow less deserving of understanding and compassion, fostering a sense of shame.

Social Isolation: Trauma survivors may withdraw from social interactions due to fear of judgment or rejection. This isolation can contribute to feelings of shame and reinforce a belief that they are somehow different or unworthy of connection.

Addressing shame in trauma survivors often requires a comprehensive and compassionate approach. Therapy, particularly trauma-focused therapies such as Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), or dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), can be helpful. Creating a supportive environment, both within the therapeutic relationship and in the individual’s broader social network, is crucial for healing and overcoming shame.

It’s important to note that everyone’s experience with trauma and shame is unique, and interventions should be tailored to the individual’s needs and circumstances.

Shervan K Shahhian