The One Percent Mindset is the philosophy of thinking, behaving, and improving:

The One Percent Mindset is the philosophy of thinking, behaving, and improving in ways that distinguish you from the majority. It emphasizes discipline, continuous learning, personal responsibility, strategic thinking, and consistency rather than relying on motivation or luck.

It may not be necessarily about being better than ninety nine percent of people. It is about striving to become a better version of yourself.

The 7 principles of the One Percent mindset

1. Continuous improvement

Aim to improve by one percent each day. Small, consistent improvements may accumulate into significant progress over time.

2. Focus on what matters

Concentrate your energy on a few meaningful priorities instead of scattering your attention across too many activities.

3. Think independently

Question assumptions, examine evidence, and make decisions based on sound reasoning rather than simply following the crowd.

4. Choose discipline over temporary motivation

Follow through on worthwhile commitments even when you do not feel motivated. Build routines that make good decisions easier.

5. Learn from failure

Treat mistakes as information. Review what happened, adjust your approach, and try again without letting setbacks define you.

6. Think long term

Consider the consequences of today’s choices. Prioritize habits and relationships that produce lasting benefits over immediate gratification.

7. Measure success by contribution

Use your knowledge, abilities, and experience to create value for others, not merely to gain status, money, or recognition.

The one percent mindset versus the ordinary mindset

Ordinary mindsetPercent mindset
“I will start when I feel ready.”“I will begin with what I have.”
Looks for excusesLooks for solutions
Seeks immediate resultsBuilds long term progress
Reacts emotionallyPauses and responds thoughtfully
Avoids uncomfortable feedbackUses feedback to improve
Compares with other peopleMeasures personal progress
Wants success without setbacksAccepts setbacks as part of growth

These are contrasting habits, not categories of people. Anyone may develop a more effective mindset.

How to practice it every day

  • Morning: Identify the one task that would make the biggest positive difference.
  • During the day: Protect your attention, prepare before acting, and respond rather than react.
  • Evening: Ask yourself three questions: What did I learn? What could I improve? What did I do that helped someone?
  • Over time: Track progress, adjust your strategy, and maintain a sustainable pace.

One important distinction: the percent mindset may not mean working constantly, suppressing emotions, or believing you must outperform everyone. Rest, flexibility, humility, and knowing when to ask for help are also strengths.

The deeper philosophy

The one percent mindset is the commitment to become a little wiser, more capable, more disciplined, and more helpful through consistent action.

Its guiding principle could be expressed this way:

Do not try to control everything. Control your preparation, your effort, your attitude, and your willingness to learn. Let consistent improvement take care of the long term results.

The goal may not be to prove that you are superior to others. It is to become more effective in how you think, how you act, and how you contribute to the world.

Shervan K Shahhian

The Ability to Adapt and Move Forward is one of the most important skills:

The Ability to Adapt and Move Forward is one of the most important skills for success, emotional resilience, and personal growth.

Life rarely unfolds exactly as we expect. We will encounter unexpected changes, disappointments, failures, conflicts, and opportunities. Although we may not control every situation, we should learn to control how we respond to it.

7 Reasons Why Adaptation Matters

1. Life is constantly changing. Circumstances, relationships, careers, and personal responsibilities change. Adaptability allows us to adjust our approach instead of remaining stuck in the past.

2. It builds emotional resilience. Resilient people experience disappointment and frustration, but they learn from these experiences and regain their ability to move forward.

3. It helps us solve problems. When one approach fails, an adaptable person considers alternatives rather than repeatedly doing the same thing and expecting a different result.

4. It reduces unnecessary suffering. Accepting what has already happened may not mean approving of it. It means recognizing reality so that we may focus our energy on what could still be changed.

5. It encourages continuous learning. Every situation may teach us something about ourselves, other people, and the world. Mistakes become opportunities for improvement rather than permanent definitions of who we are.

6. It strengthens decision making. Adaptability helps us evaluate new information, reconsider assumptions, and make better decisions when circumstances change.

7. It keeps us moving toward our goals. Sometimes the destination remains the same, but the path must change. Flexibility allows us to pursue our objectives without becoming attached to only one way of achieving them.

The Adaptation Mindset

Accept the situation

Recognize what has happened without wasting energy denying reality.

Assess your options

Separate what you may control from what you cannot, and identify your next practical step.

Adapt your strategy

Change your approach when circumstances or new information require it.

Take action and move forward

Learn from the experience, make a thoughtful decision, and take the next step.

Examples in everyday life

  • When you experience failure: Learn what went wrong, adjust your strategy, and try again.
  • When a relationship ends: Allow yourself to grieve, learn from the experience, and gradually rebuild your life.
  • When circumstances change unexpectedly: Reassess your priorities and identify new opportunities.
  • When someone treats you poorly: Adapt by establishing boundaries rather than repeatedly exposing yourself to the same harmful behavior.
  • When you make a mistake: Accept responsibility, correct what you can, and use the experience to make better decisions.

An important psychological distinction

Adapting may not mean tolerating abuse, abandoning your values, suppressing your emotions, or accepting every circumstance without resistance.

True adaptability means knowing when to accept, when to adjust, when to persevere, and when to walk away.

Sometimes moving forward means changing your behavior. Sometimes it means changing your environment. And sometimes it means giving yourself time to recover before taking another step.

The goal may not to react impulsively to every change but to respond thoughtfully and effectively.

A powerful principle to live by:

Accept. Assess. Adapt. Advance.

“I cannot control every situation that life presents to me, but I may choose how I respond. I learn from the past, adapt to the present, and move forward toward a better future.”

Ultimately, the ability to adapt and move forward is a sign of psychological flexibility. It allows you to remain open to new possibilities without losing your sense of identity, principles, or direction.

You may not have to have every answer today. You need the willingness to learn, the courage to adjust, and the discipline to take the next constructive step.

Shervan K Shahhian

A Psychology Informed Performance Coach is a professional who may use principles from psychology, behavioral science, motivation, and emotional intelligence to help people:

A psychology informed performance coach is a coach and it is NOT a licensed psychologist, licensed Psychotherapist, and a LMFT, But some coaches could be licensed in psychology or other licensed in other mental health specilizations.

A Psychology Informed Performance Coach is a professional who may use principles from psychology, behavioral science, motivation, and emotional intelligence to help people improve their performance, decision making, leadership, and personal effectiveness.

Unlike a traditional performance coach who may focus primarily on goals and productivity, a psychology informed performance coach also considers how people think, feel, respond to stress, develop habits, and make decisions under pressure.

What may a psychology informed performance coach do?

1. Improves executive performance

Helps executives, entrepreneurs, and business owners improve leadership, confidence, communication, strategic thinking, and decision making.

2. Develops psychological resilience

Helps clients manage stress, setbacks, uncertainty, pressure, and difficult interpersonal situations without becoming overwhelmed or losing focus.

3. Changes unproductive behavior patterns

Uses psychological principles to identify limiting beliefs, avoidance, procrastination, self-sabotage, and habits that interfere with achieving goals.

4. Strengthens leadership and relationships

Helps clients understand personality differences, emotional reactions, conflict, motivation, team dynamics, and effective communication.

How may this different from other professionals?

ProfessionalPrimary focus
Executive coachLeadership, management, and organizational effectiveness
Performance coachAchieving goals and improving results
Psychology informed performance coachPerformance through the lens of human behavior, thinking, emotions, and motivation
PsychotherapistAssessing and treating mental health conditions and psychological distress

These roles may overlap. The important distinction is the professional’s training, scope of practice, and the services being provided.

A psychology informed performance coach may or may not necessarily have to be a licensed psychologist. The title itself is NOT a license, and coaching must NOT be presented as psychotherapy when the provider is NOT appropriately authorized to practice it.

What psychological approaches might a coach use?

A well trained coach might draw on:

  • Cognitive behavioral principles: May recognize how thoughts influence behavior and performance.
  • Positive psychology: Developing strengths, optimism, meaning, and engagement.
  • Motivational interviewing: Helping clients resolve ambivalence and strengthen their own motivation.
  • Emotional intelligence: Improving emotional awareness, self-regulation, empathy, and communication.
  • Behavioral science: Building habits, changing routines, and improving follow through.
  • Stress management techniques: Improving focus and responding constructively to pressure.

These approaches should be applied within the coach’s competence, with clear boundaries between coaching and clinical treatment.

Example: Working with a business owner

Imagine a successful business owner who has excellent technical skills but struggles to delegate, becomes defensive when criticized, and makes impulsive decisions under stress.

A psychology informed performance coach might help the owner:

  1. Recognize the thoughts and emotions that trigger defensive reactions.
  2. Examine beliefs about trust, control, and personal responsibility.
  3. Practice pausing before making consequential decisions.
  4. Develop delegation and communication strategies.
  5. Establish measurable leadership goals and review progress.

The objective is NOT to diagnose the business owner. It is to help the person understand their behavioral patterns and improve their professional effectiveness.

Potential areas of specialization could include:

  • Leadership psychology and executive decision making.
  • Behavioral change and habit development.
  • Emotional regulation under pressure.
  • Resilience, adaptability, and psychological flexibility.
  • Communication, conflict resolution, and interpersonal effectiveness.
  • Hypnosis informed performance and confidence work, within your competence and applicable professional boundaries.

How could one get started

  1. Define your niche. Decide whether you want to work primarily with business owners, corporate executives, entrepreneurs, or professionals in high pressure occupations.
  2. Strengthen your coaching skills. Consider training in executive coaching, coaching psychology, organizational behavior, goal setting, and leadership development. From a accredited training program.
  3. Create a structured coaching process. Develop an initial assessment of goals and strengths, a performance development plan, regular coaching sessions, and measurable progress reviews.
  4. Build a professional identity. Develop a clear service description, a professional biography, and referral relationships with business consultants, attorneys, accountants, and other professionals who serve business owners.

Shervan K Shahhian

Executive Coaches are Professionals who may help business leaders, executives, managers, and other professionals:

Executive coaches are professionals who help business leaders, executives, managers, and other professionals improve their leadership, decision making, communication, and overall effectiveness.

Think of an executive coach as a strategic thinking partner who helps a person become a more effective leader, manage challenges, and achieve professional goals.

  1. What Do Executive Coaches Do?

Executive coaches commonly help clients with:

Leadership development: Becoming a more effective and confident leader.

Decision making: Evaluating options, managing uncertainty, and making sound decisions.

Emotional intelligence: Understanding emotions, recognizing personal biases, and responding constructively to others.

Communication: Improving listening, negotiation, conflict resolution, and public speaking.

Stress management: Managing pressure, preventing burnout, and maintaining perspective.

Workplace relationships: Addressing difficult employees, interpersonal conflicts, and organizational politics.

Career advancement: Preparing for promotions, senior leadership positions, or career transitions.

Performance improvement: Identifying blind spots, changing ineffective habits, and achieving measurable goals.

  1. Who Hires Executive Coaches?

CEOs and senior executives

They may need confidential support with strategic decisions, organizational change, leadership challenges, and the responsibilities of running a company.

Managers and emerging leaders

They learn how to motivate employees, delegate responsibilities, give feedback, and manage conflict.

Entrepreneurs and business owners

They work on business growth, leadership habits, time management, and the challenges of making important decisions under pressure.

Professionals seeking advancement

They develop confidence, improve interpersonal skills, and prepare for greater responsibility.

3. Executive Coach vs. Therapist vs. Business Consultant

FeatureExecutive coachTherapistBusiness consultant
Primary focusLeadership and performanceMental health and emotional well beingBusiness problems and solutions
Typical approachQuestions, feedback, goal settingClinical assessment and therapeutic interventionsAnalysis, recommendations, expertise
Main objectiveHelp clients improve effectivenessReduce distress and improve psychological functioningSolve organizational or operational problems
Time orientationOften future and goal orientedPast experiences, present difficulties, and future goalsCurrent business needs and future strategy

These roles may overlap, but they are not interchangeable. Executive coaching is Not a substitute for mental health treatment when clinical care is needed. This only complemantray not a form of psychological treatment.

  1. What May Make a Good Executive Coach?

An effective coach may demonstrates:

Strong listening and questioning skills.

Knowledge of leadership and organizational behavior.

Emotional intelligence and professional judgment.

The ability to provide constructive, honest feedback.

Clear goals and a way to evaluate progress.

Appropriate confidentiality, boundaries, and ethical conduct.

Some coaches may backgrounds in psychology: (but they may NOT be Clinical Psychologist, Psychotherapist, LMFT’s, etc.), organizational development, business, or human resources. Others have extensive leadership experience. The title “executive coach” alone may not establish a person’s qualifications or competence. Coaching is NOT uniformly regulated as a licensed profession in the United States, so clients should evaluate training, experience, references, and credentials carefully.

  1. How Does Executive Coaching Work?

A typical coaching engagement may follow five steps:

Assessment

Identify strengths, weaknesses, leadership challenges, and goals.

Goal setting

Define specific outcomes, such as improving communication or managing conflict.

Coaching sessions

Discuss real world situations, explore options, and practice new approaches.

Action and feedback

Apply new strategies at work and evaluate what happens.

Measure progress

Review outcomes and determine what needs further development.

Sessions often take place weekly or every few weeks, either in person or online. Some coaching engagements last a few months; others continue longer.

  1. How Psychology Relates to Executive Coaching

Executive coaching may have an important connection to certain complementary fields, particularly in understanding coaching, motivation, certain personalities, certain biases, emotional decision making, and relationships, but not psychology.

For example, a leader who reacts defensively to criticism might work with a coach to:

Recognize the thoughts and emotions triggered by feedback.

Identify assumptions that may distort their interpretation.

Practice pausing before responding.

Develop assertive communication and active listening.

Evaluate whether workplace relationships improve.

A coach with appropriate mental health training may bring valuable coaching insight to this process, while maintaining the distinction between coaching and clinical treatment.

The central principle: Executive coaching may help people understand how they think, how they influence others, and how they may translate greater self-awareness into better performance.

Shervan K Shahhian

The Art of Adaptation is the ability to adjust, without losing your core values or sense of self:

“Consider Alternative Interpretations and Strategies.Changing your strategy without abandoning your principles.”

The Art of Adaptation is the ability to adjust your thoughts, behaviors, strategies, and expectations when circumstances change, without losing your core values or sense of self.

In mental health, adaptation could be closely related to resilience, cognitive flexibility, emotional regulation, and problem solving.

Flex Without Breaking Down

A simple formula

Adaptation: accepting reality, learning from it, adjusting your response, continuing forward.

It may not mean simply “going along with everything.” Healthy adaptation involves knowing what to change and what not to change.

Five elements of adaptation

  1. Awareness: Recognize that circumstances have changed.
  2. Acceptance: Stop fighting the reality that may not be changed.
  3. Flexibility: Consider alternative interpretations and strategies.
  4. Action: Change behavior based on what you have learned.
  5. Integration: Incorporate the experience into your future decision making.

Adaptation vs. Rigidity

RigidityAdaptation
“This is how it has always been done.”“What does this situation require now?”
Resists new informationUses new information
Repeats the same strategyChanges strategy when necessary
Sees change as a threatCan see change as information
Protects certaintyTolerates uncertainty

An important psychological distinction

Adaptation may not be the same as conformity.

A person may adapt while maintaining strong boundaries and principles.

For example:

“I cannot control what happened, but I can control how I respond to what happened.”

That is adaptive thinking.

But:

“I must change myself to keep everyone else happy.”

May represent people pleasing, fear, or loss of identity, rather than healthy adaptation.

Adaptation under stress

Under significant stress, the mind may become less flexible. A person may enter a survival-oriented mode characterized by hypervigilance, avoidance, emotional shutdown, impulsivity, or rigid thinking.

Effective adaptation therefore involves learning to ask:

“Is my current response helping me deal with the situation, or is it a response I learned in an earlier situation that no longer fits?”

The deeper principle

The strongest adaptation may not be changing who you are whenever circumstances change.

It is:

Changing your strategy without abandoning your principles.

That is why adaptation may be closely connected to resilience and psychological flexibility: bend without breaking, learn without losing yourself, and change without becoming ungrounded.

Shervan K Shahhian

“The Greatest University is the University of Trial and Error, by Shervan K Shahhian.”

“The Greatest University is the University of Trial and Error, by Shervan K Shahhian.” is a possible metaphor for the idea that some of life’s deepest learning comes from. Mistakes or bad experiences rather than instruction alone.

Why?

1. . Mistakes turns information into knowledge. You may read about swimming your whole life, but actually getting into the water teaches you things a book may never fully convey.

2. Mistakes provide feedback. When things doesn’t workout they way we expected, but if we receive feedback about what needs to change. Failure becomes a form of learning.

3. Trial and error may develop judgment. Repeated mistakes and bad experiences might help us recognize patterns: What may work? What doesn’t work? When should we persist? When should we change directions?

4. . Mistakes may develop resilience. Learning that mistakes and bad experience’s are survivable at times, they may reduce the fear of being wrong. We may become more willing to experiment?, learn, adapt, and try again.

5. . Mistakes may promote metacognition. After bad experiences, you may ask yourself:

  • What just happened?
  • What things did I assume?
  • What things did I get wrong?
  • What things did I learn from it?
  • What things will I do differently next time?

That may turn mistakes and bad experiences into wisdom.

But there may be an important qualification

Trial and error may not automatically promote good learning. Repeating the same mistake without reflection is simply repetition.

A more accurate formula may be:

Experience...feedback…reflection…adjustment...new experience…learning

So the “University of Trial and Error, by Shervan K Shahhian” is really the University of Experience, Feedback, Learning and Adaptation.

In psychological terms, this may closely be related to experiential learning: We may learn by acting, observing the consequences, reflecting on what happened, and it may modify our future behavior.

And perhaps the most important lesson may be:

Mistakes may not necessarily evidence that we failed; it may be evidence that our current strategy needs updating, improving and changing.

“The Greatest University is the University of Trial and Error, by Shervan K Shahhian.”

Shervan K Shahhian

Present Focused living means deliberately directing your attention toward what is happening now:

Present focused living means deliberately directing your attention toward what is happening now, rather than becoming excessively absorbed in the past or preoccupied with an imagined future.

It may not mean ignoring the past or refusing to plan for the future. It may mean using the past for learning and the future for planning, while recognizing that your actual ability to act exists in the present moment.

A simple way to understand it

The past is for learning. The future is for planning. The present is for living and acting.

Three time perspectives

TimeHealthy useUnhelpful pattern
PastReflection, learning, processingRumination, regret, resentment
FuturePlanning, preparation, realistic anticipationCatastrophizing, excessive worry
PresentAction, awareness, engagementAvoidance or impulsive distraction

What present focused living looks like

Instead of:

“Why did I let that happen years ago?”

Ask:

“What can I learn from what happened, and what can I do today?”

Instead of:

“What if something terrible happens tomorrow?”

Ask:

“Is there something reasonable I can prepare for today?”

And when there isn’t an immediate action to take:

“Can I allow myself to experience this moment without solving everything?”

The psychological principle

Present focused living is closely related to mindfulness, but it may be broader than mindfulness meditation.

It may involve:

  • Attention: noticing what is happening now.
  • Acceptance: allowing the present to be what it is without immediately fighting it.
  • Metacognition: recognizing when your mind has moved into rumination or worry.
  • Behavioral choice: deciding what action is useful now.
  • Emotional regulation: experiencing emotions without automatically reacting to them.
  • Reality orientation: distinguishing what is actually happening from what you fear, remember, or imagine.

The “rear view mirror” analogy

The rear view mirror is small because you need to know where you’ve been but the windshield is much larger because you need to see where you’re going.

The past remains important. You occasionally need to look backward. But driving while staring continuously into the rear view mirror is dangerous.

Likewise, excessive attention to the past may become rumination, while excessive attention to the future could become chronic worry.

Present focused living brings your attention back to:

“What is happening, and what may I meaningfully do about it, right now?”

A practical 30 second exercise

Pause and ask:

  1. What is happening right now?
  2. What am I feeling right now?
  3. What am I thinking about?
  4. Am I in the past, future, or present?
  5. Is there something I can actually do about this right now?
  6. If yes…take the next reasonable action.
  7. If no…return attention to the present.

The goal may not be to live only in the present. It is to avoid allowing yesterday’s pain or tomorrow’s uncertainty to consume today’s life.

Shervan K Shahhian

Self-loathing may be a deep and persistent feeling of dislike toward oneself:

Self-Loathing may be a deep, persistent feeling of dislike, contempt, shame, or even hatred toward oneself. It goes beyond ordinary self-criticism: instead of thinking “I made a mistake,” a person may conclude “There is something fundamentally wrong with me.”

Common features of self-loathing

Harsh self-criticism: “I’m stupid,” “I always mess things up.”

Shame: Feeling fundamentally defective, bad, unworthy, or unacceptable.

Self-rejection: Difficulty accepting oneself, including one’s appearance, personality, history, or limitations.

Negative self-comparison: Assuming other people are better, more attractive, successful, or deserving.

Difficulty accepting compliments: Positive feedback may feel undeserved or unbelievable.

Rumination: Repeatedly replaying mistakes, failures, or perceived shortcomings.

Self-sabotage: Undermining relationships, opportunities, or personal goals because of beliefs such as “I don’t deserve good things.”

Social withdrawal: Avoiding others because of fear of rejection or exposure.

Difficulty with self-compassion: Treating oneself much more harshly than one would treat another person.

Self-criticism vs. self-loathing

A useful distinction could be:

Healthy self-reflection:“I handled that situation poorly. What can I learn from it?”

Harsh self-criticism:“I really screwed that up. I should have done better.”

Self-loathing: “I’m a terrible person. I always ruin everything. I don’t deserve to feel good about myself.”

The key difference is that self-criticism focuses on behavior, while self-loathing tends to attack the person’s entire identity and worth.

Where can it come from?

Self-loathing may develop through repeated experiences such as chronic criticism, rejection, bullying, abuse, neglect, traumatic experiences, unrealistic standards, perfectionism, or persistent experiences of failure or shame. It may also become intertwined with depression, anxiety, trauma related difficulties, eating disorders, or other psychological problems, but self-loathing itself may not be a diagnosis.

A psychological cycle

A common cycle may look like:

Negative experience, self-blame, shame, self-loathing, withdrawal/avoidance, reduced opportunities for positive experiences, more negative beliefs about oneself.

One important therapeutic goal is therefore not simply to replace “I hate myself” with “I love myself.” For many people, a more realistic starting point is:

“I can acknowledge my flaws and mistakes without concluding that I am worthless.”

That shift, from self-condemnation to self-compassion and realistic self-acceptance, may be psychologically significant.

Shervan K Shahhian

Self-Rejection may be the psychological process of judging, criticizing, or emotionally pushing away parts of yourself:

Self-rejection is the psychological process of judging, criticizing, or emotionally pushing away parts of yourself that you believe are unacceptable, inadequate, flawed, or unworthy of acceptance.

In simple terms, it is an internal message such as:

“There is something wrong with me, and I don’t fully accept myself because of it.”

Common forms of self-rejection

Self-rejection may appear in several ways:

Negative self-talk: “I’m stupid,” “I’m a failure,” or “I’ll never be good enough.”

Shame: Feeling that you are not merely doing something wrong, but that you are wrong or defective.

Body rejection: Disliking or feeling disgust toward aspects of one’s appearance.

Emotional rejection: Criticizing yourself for having feelings such as anger, sadness, fear, or vulnerability.

Rejection of personal needs: Feeling guilty for needing help, affection, rest, attention, or support.

Identity rejection: Suppressing parts of yourself because you believe they will be judged or rejected by others.

Perfectionism: Believing that you must achieve exceptionally high standards before you deserve self-respect.

Self-sabotage: Acting in ways that reinforce an underlying belief that you don’t deserve success, love, or happiness.

Where can self-rejection come from?

Self-rejection may develop through experiences such as:

Childhood criticism, rejection or conditional acceptance, shame, negative core beliefs, self-criticism, self-rejection

For example: a child who repeatedly hears “You’re never good enough” may eventually internalize that message. As an adult, the original external critic may become an internal critic.

Other contributors may include:

Bullying or social rejection

Emotional neglect

Trauma

Abusive or highly critical relationships

Unrealistic cultural or social standards

Chronic comparison with others

Perfectionism

Repeated failures or humiliating experiences

Body dissatisfaction

Depression and anxiety

Self-rejection vs. healthy self-reflection

These are very different.

Healthy self-reflection:

“I made a mistake. What can I learn from it?”

Self-rejection:

“I made a mistake because I’m a worthless person.”

Healthy self-reflection evaluates behavior. Self-rejection often attacks identity.

A particularly important concept

Self-rejection may become a self-reinforcing cycle:

Negative belief about self,

Self-criticism,

Shame and emotional pain,

Avoidance, withdrawal, or self-sabotage,

Experiences interpreted as evidence that the negative belief is true,

Stronger self-rejection.

One of the central goals of psychotherapy may not be to convince someone that they are perfect, but to help them develop self-acceptance, self-compassion, realistic self-appraisal, and the ability to separate their worth as a person from their mistakes or perceived shortcomings.

In one sentence:

Self-rejection may be the internalized rejection of oneself, often expressed through shame, harsh self-criticism, feelings of inadequacy, or the belief that one is fundamentally unworthy of acceptance or love.

Shervan K Shahhian

“Maxxing Culture” could be a contemporary internet culture centered :

“Maxxing Culture” could be a contemporary internet culture centered on the idea of maximizing or optimizing some aspect of yourself, appearance, fitness, productivity, money, status, relationships, or even mental performance.

The suffix “-maxxing” essentially means taking something to its perceived maximum. The language grew partly out of gaming terminology such as min maxing and later became strongly associated with online looksmaxxing communities.

Examples of possible “maxxing”

  • Looksmaxxing: maximizing physical attractiveness
  • Gymmaxxing: maximizing physique and muscular development
  • Moneymaxxing: maximizing income or financial status
  • Productivitymaxxing: optimizing work and productivity
  • Sleepmaxxing: trying to optimize sleep
  • Healthmaxxing: maximizing health and physical performance
  • Socialmaxxing: maximizing social status or interpersonal success

The mental health issue

There is an important distinction between healthy self-improvement and maxxing culture.

Healthy self-improvement may say:

“How can I become healthier, happier, and more capable?”

Maxxing culture can gradually become:

“I am not good enough unless I optimize myself.”

That shift may turn self-improvement into compulsive self-optimization. Social media may intensify the process through constant comparison, idealized images, ranking, and algorithmically reinforced content. Recent psychological commentary has connected extreme forms of looksmaxxing with unstable self-esteem, anxiety, body dissatisfaction, and self-rejection.

A useful psychological formulation

You may think of maxxing culture as:

Self-improvement, optimization, comparison, perfectionism, self-surveillance

The danger may be that the individual begins to experience the self as a project that is never finished.

Instead of “I want to improve myself,” the underlying psychological message becomes:

“I must continually upgrade myself to be worthy, attractive, successful, or socially acceptable.”

This makes maxxing culture particularly interesting from the perspectives of self-esteem, perfectionism, social comparison, body image, identity, and compulsive behavior.

And importantly, not every use of “-maxxing” is serious or harmful. Online, the term is also used humorously for example, someone might jokingly say they are “coffee-maxxing.” The concern arises when optimization becomes obsessive or one’s self-worth becomes dependent on achieving an ever moving ideal.

Shervan K Shahhian